Posts by Agent Double- O- Soul

#10 - you look like a hooker i knew in phoenix.. #9 - you remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend.. #8 - if you were a booger i'd pick you first.. #7 - you look just like my mama.

i love my mama.. #6 - gross!

Agent Double- O- Soul

whenever a woman coughs say

"that's a nasty cough, you need to go home and rub some Vick on your chest, hi my names Vic".

"I'm looking for treasure, can I look in your chest?"

"
		Is your last name Jacobs by any chance ?? because your a real cracker."

"
		Since you lost your virginity, can I play with the box it came in?"

"I'm a tour guide. want to tour my place?"

"What makes love like a tiger and winks?" [She doesn't know]. You Wink

"Can I have a photo of u, so Santa knows exactly what I want for Christmas."

"If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?"

"I lost my virginity, can I have yours?"

Walk up to a girl and say

"You see my friend over there? He wants to know if u think I'm good looking"

"do you have a plaster? I think I scraped my knee when I fell for you"

 "I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me?"

 "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again?"

"those are nice clothes, can I talk you out of them?"

 "If you were a burger at McDonalds, I'd call you McBeautiful"

"My love for you is like diahorrea, I just can't hold it in"

"ur ass is as firm as a basketball can I dribble on it"

(lick finger and wipe on top)"... now then lets get you out of those wet clothes"

"hi, my names doug..thats god with a little bit of u"

"You've got 206 bones in your body!! Want one more??"

"I've lost my bed can I sleep in yours?"

"I'V FORGOT YOUR NAME - SO CAN I JUST CALL YOU MINE?"

"if u had 11 roses and looked in the mirror u would c the 12 most beautiful things in the world"

"Are u looking for Mr. right? Or Mr. right now?"

"Write on a piece of paper "hot stuff" and drop it in front the girl and say, o u dropped ur name tag"

"did u know they changed the alphabet? they put U and I together"

"that shirt is very becoming on you, but then, if I were on you, I would be coming too"

"you're 2 smooth....I think u need a hump"

"your eyes are like spanners..... every time you look at me my nuts tighten"

"I may not be the best looking man in here, but I'm the only one talking to you"

"Hi, how do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?"

"Do you believe in love at first sight, or shall I walk past you again?"

"Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?"

"are you wearing star wars underwear? (no why) cause your arse is out of this world"

Bet 1 or 2 0f those score 10 on the slap-ometer!

Seeyaz......

00

27

recommend a book

by DanTheMan in

jw
friends

any book that you like.. i am particularly interested in reading some good non-fiction.. crisis of conscience tops my recommendations, i think it is one of the best books i've ever read.

but you don't have to recommend apostate books.. currently i am enjoying dale carnegie's how to win friends and influence people.

i am enjoying it and trying to take the advice to heart - namely, don't be so negative!.

(I posted this suggestion on another thread ) 'The Moon's A Balloon' by David Niven. For a fun life story it's as good as any. Growing up at the early part of the last century, difference between drab Britain & exciting America, first sexual experience to the sound of 'Yes We Have No Bananas' with a 17 year old foul mouthed prostitute who became a best friend & made him worldly wise. Long time since I read it but I remember it being a great yarn .

Seeya

00

9

I'm desperate for a good R***

by Beck_Melbourne in

...a good read - anyone got some suggestions?

i've just finished jean auel's last book in the clan of the cavebear series...and wilbur smith's latest (don't bother, its cr*p), and now i'm hard up for another book, but i tend to sway back to the author's i know.

sooo...if you know of any great books/authors/dynasties...please do tell.

Agent Double- O- Soul

It all depends on what your bag is to start with I suppose - & I woz never a great reader to start with - but autobiog-wise I thought 'The Moon's A Balloon' by David Niven woz great, even if you're not into actors or Hollywood reads, which I'm not. Years since I read it but there's some really hilarious stuff in there. The story about the wealthy dude who'd hire a bunch of prostitutes & get them to stand in a circle with a peacock feather up their backsides as he stood in the middle with a feather up his own while getting off on pecking at the corn chucked on the floor ( I think they didn't get paid if they laughed ) is an image, among others, you don't easily forget. A funny life story, ups & downs, triumphs & tragedies etc. Well worth a read but maybe not your thing, autobiogs?

Hope this helps.....

00

6

Anybody Love the Associations...

by jgnat in

as much as my honey does?

he dearly wants to find a cd, tape, whatever.

do any of you guys have any leads on where he can find their music?

Agent Double- O- Soul

There's also a couple of tracks on the 4 CD set 'Monterey International Pop Festival' ( 'Along Comes Mary' + 'Windy') as well as one track on 'The Complete Monterey Pop Festival' 3 DVD set where you can see them open the event with 'Along Comes Mary'. Lotsa bucks for just those 3 tracks I know but then if you like the other stuff too then well worth the buy, especially the DVD.

Stay Associated......!

00

26

Kazaa and spyware!

by DanTheMan in

jw
friends

about a month ago i downloaded kazaa.

i used it to snag a couple of songs, and haven't used it at all since.

(i'm on 56k, so it's hardly worth the effort).. but ever since i installed it, i've been getting annoying pop-up ads.

Agent Double- O- Soul

The last version I saw of Morpheus had the same spyware stuff too. Also a route for viruses. Some people probably have nuthin to do all day but think this stuff up like that Winamp ( ? ) / stealthbomb stuff, or code red or spyware or whatever. I recently saw some privacy issues with Realplayer, too. The bottom line line I suppose is to investigate anything we install beforehand in case there's a catch ( that DivX Gain junk woz 1 helluva system hog with me ) & keep the virus definitions up to date. Amazing how we install stuff sometimes no questions asked when you think about it but then we're all green at one time or another, eh? Anyway, maybe you guys already knew that about Morpheus but there you are.

Stay clean......

Art.

76

What kind of music do you like?

by JH in

jw
friends

what kind of music do you like?

what groups do you listen to?.

do you just listen to music from your generation only or do you also like music from the past?.

Agent Double- O- Soul

PS if anybody really likes Jimi a lot I've got 1 or 2 very interesting links you might like.

Seeyaz...

00

21

Bad News For Vivamus!!!

by ISP in

jw
friends

smoking to be banned in amsterdam coffee shops

smoking is to be banned in amsterdam's famous coffee shops where cannabis is sold without fear of prosecution.. .

under a new public smoking ban, coffee shops will still be able to sell joints but customers may have to go outside to smoke them.. holland's new national health guidelines, due to take effect from the start of next year, were aimed at second-hand smoke from tobacco, not marijuana.. but they are also threatening the liberal dutch drugs policy which attracts tourists from all over the world.. "the whole point of going to a coffee shop is to smoke," complained arjan roskam, chairman of the union for cannabis retailers.. the head of the dutch anti-smoking lobby, clean air now, conceded that banning smoking in coffee shops was not the goal.. but willem van den oetelaar still backed the move.

Agent Double- O- Soul

The Dutch government like Russia & conservative? Wowee that's 'new light' for me. I thought it was as per Ali G: "Imagine a country where there's no laws ,serious maff & the government buys you skank. This place exist in a country called Europe &, luckily, they want us to join!" Just shows you think you know. If it's hash or cigars I don't bother but if there's too many ciggies that might be too much for me with the passive smokin. Shame we can't get passive drinking, eh? Save a few notes on a night out that would.

Take care...

00

16

Did You Stifle a "Gift" That You Could Have Grown Because You Were A JW?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i see a lot of talent here.

those that love music, poetry, literature,etc.......do you feel that if you weren't a witness, that you could have grown in your talent or "gift"?

Agent Double- O- Soul

What gets me, thinking about it now, is that it was ok for Hank Marvin & George Benson to be working, & now Venus Williams & sis, Prince or the Artist or whatever he's now called & Larry Graham ( at least I think LG's involved ) , but negativity would come our way if we did anything remotely similar or even just wanted to. Me I was born with a silver spoon in me mouth of sorts. Mum sat me at a piano when I was somewhere near 2 years old, held my wee fingers & did 'chopsticks' , & the way she tells the story is that she went out the room & a few moments later she heard me playing that tune. She used to mention too how I started talking when I was 9 months old. For years I didn't know what that meant but I think it's coz that's kinda early, no? So anyway yeah there's probably a few directions guitar wise I could've explored but the vibe of it being 'worldly' plus maybe also the feeling that you'd be 'contradicting' certain things you'd heard brought about enough fear & guilt to stifle you. As one bloke I remember would call them - 'the right - wingers of the truth' . It's funny how, even then, you knew through experience that there were different versions of the truth concerning what's 'acceptable' depending on who you were talking to & where you lived but it was always the most limited thinking dudes that had the impact, probably coz they're always the loudest characters when it came to making their ideas known. So yeah I sympathise with someone who could've been doing something vital work & time's passed them by but that's true also that we need to try & not be similar negative figures - 'specially with ourselves! I've had enough of being tramped on & beat by some narrow - minded clot. No way am I joining in! However, if some here might not now see all their potential fulfilled for some reason, then that's a real shame. Maybe we should all write to the above artists or their congregations & let them know that we are all seriously 'stumbled' by 'what they're doing'. Get them to have to give up what they love doing & see how it feels. Well, I probably dont have the heart even for that. Anyway, I'm now working on me 3 track promo CD with me pc, then the rest of my stuff for a full album, & then.......

who knows!

Rock & Roll you dudes

00-Soul xxoo

76

What kind of music do you like?

by JH in

jw
friends

what kind of music do you like?

what groups do you listen to?.

do you just listen to music from your generation only or do you also like music from the past?.

Agent Double- O- Soul

Mid to late 60s / early 70s rock but loadsa other stuff aswell.

The Jimi Hendrix Experience, Traffic, Julie Driscoll with the Trinity, Monterey Pop, some gems among psych stuff like Tomorrow etc, The Sensational Alex Harvey Band, Free, John McLaughlin's various morphications,

Big Bill Broonzy.

From the Glam period Bolan, Bowie, Slade, Alice Cooper etc. Rouge, anybody?

Aztec, is it the real 1st time stuff you like? UK Subs 'Another Kind Of Blue', 1st ( only? ) Ruts album, X-Ray Specs 'Germ Free Adolescents', Rezillos 'Can't Stand The Rezillos', Damned ( 1st ), Buzzcocks 'Spiral Scratch', gawd there's loads. Makes me want to cover myself in badges.

Film soundtracks. Ennio Morricone, Roy Budd, John Barry, Lalo Schiffrin, dedahdedahdedah.... some of the most powerful writers in the world & could blow your head CLEAN off. But then... you gotta ask yourself a question. Badges? Badges? Do you really need those stinking badges?

Pulp Fusion CD series ("Return to the Tough Side", "Revenge of the Ghetto Grooves" & so on) - funk breaks & stuff from a time when jazzers went superbad! Stoned soul picnics that easily trash them negative waves.

Folk wise traditional Irish always sounds great tho' I know nowt about it. + Pogues, Corries, whatever... add Guinness & a coal-fired pub & we're sent. I want to live in one. Is there one on the shelf in Wall-Mart?

TV soundtracks. Avengers, Persuaders, UFO, Protectors, Starsky & Hutch, Ironside, U.N.C.L.E, Journey To The Unknown, Budgie, Dave Allen, Professionals.... my engines cannae take it skipper. This thread could self-destruct in 5 seconds.

Classicly: Elgar, Rachmaninov, Wagner, Delius, Bach, Puccinni, others...

Things I bought most recently:

The Complete Monterey Pop 3 dvd set. 2 hours extra footage. 5.1 surround sound. Awesome.
While in the shop the guy put on Dusty In Memphis. That's it. I want that too.
Ziggy The Motion Picture dvd. Where's that rouge again?...
Miles Davis 'The Complete In A Silent Way Sessions'. A really nice wee box.
Spencer Davis Group 'Time Seller'. Comes with a cool wee enhanced vcd 60s documentary.
Stephen Stills 'Stephen Stills'.
Led Zeppelin 'DVD'. Over 5 hours of unreleased live stuff. Minted.

Blow Up's 'Exclusive Blend' & related. Can I describe it? Probably not without writing 'jacket liner notes'. Will I bother?
You decide!

Orbital do an immense show.

Finger -lickin' good groovy trip of the moment: Mel Torme version of 'Games People Play'. Shwwiiiingiiiing!
Ass - wipin' bad heavy trip of the moment: 'Gimmie Shelter' DVD. Too many negative waves for early in the morning.
'Heavy bread necessary' trip of the moment: That Ed Sullivan monster DVD set. Prezzie, anybody? Pretty please & sugar?
Loveliest & most luscious erotica: Brigitte Bardot original version of Je t'aime. "..entre tes reins.." oooooooooooh...
Most perfect beautiful instrumental: Keith Mansfield's 'Life Of Leisure'. So easy. So laid back. So Sensual. I want to be there now. I'm going....... ( blissed out into higher conciousness )

Be groovy...

Art.

Oh..& hello. ( few posts as 'regdwight'. Lousy moniker.)